Changes

 Greetings friends,

Much has changed since my last post. My mom sold my childhood home, and has been on the road since the beginning of summer, while she looks for land to buy and settle down on.

Myself, my sister ShawNee, her husband Dusty, and my nephew Gideon, are now living in town in an apartment. While city life has been difficult to get used to for both ShawNee and I, getting away from the rest of the family and finally having our own space to follow our own interests has been wonderful! 

We have not lost sight of our goal to one day live on a homestead far, far away from mainstream civilization, and every day we work towards that goal. But in the meantime, we are preparing, and learning as much as we can.

Gideon and I watching nursery rhymes

Living With Intention

 Living life with intention and meaning. It is a concept that has been weighing on my mind and heart recently. I have struggled with severe (though manageable) depression most of my teen and adult life, and recently I have allowed that depression and despair to completely take over my life. It is a vicious cycle that spirals ever downward. I feel trapped in the situation I am in, living in a tiny bedroom in my family home, surrounded by noise, chaos, disorganization, and clutter. In that depression I have allowed my space and my appearance to reflect the emptiness and despair I feel in my heart. My room is dirty and cluttered, and I have been in either my PJ's or work clothes for months. I have not been attentive to my health, consuming junkfood and fastfood because it is easy, and I don't have to fight over the kitchen with the rest of the family. I feel gross and lazy, and therefore I sink further down the spiral. 

Then my mom found some videos on YouTube about quiet/simple/slow living, and through that I have discovered that I am not alone in my need for peace, quiet, and solitude. I am an introvert, and I am very hypersensitive to sounds, clutter, and chaos. Something they all spoke of was living with intention, and making a place they can retreat to and decompress. 

As this new year begins, I would like to consider some small goals to help myself break free of this downward spiral I have been caught up in, and maybe they will also help me find my way to that quiet place that I need. 

Living With Intention - Goals for 2021

1. Focus on health - Reduce fast food, processed foods, sugar and carbs. Make lunches for work, and eat as much homemade and whole, fresh food as financially possible.
2. Become more active - Camping, nature walks, fishing. Whatever it takes to spend more time in nature, during this depression, I have completely lost my connection to nature.
3. Reduce clutter and belongings - Only keep what is necessary or what brings me joy. The more clutter I have around me, the more claustrophobic and anxious I become. 
4. Reduce time spent on electronics - I am a gamer, but it is easy to allow that to become my escape instead of just a hobby. 
5. Build a space that brings peace - Having a place I can get away, from the noise and the chaos, a place that brings out my creativity and inspires me. 
6. Practice herbalism, gardening, and husbandry - I have always felt a connection to the earth, and love to make thing grow and prosper. I love to surround myself with plants and animals. 
7. Wise spending habits - Reduce the money spent on fast food, temporary pleasures, and frivolous things. Save money, pay off debts, and invest in things that benefit a long term goal or add to my peace. 

Not All Those Who Wander are Lost

 All that is gold does not glitter,

Not all those who wander are lost;

The old that is strong does not wither,

Deep roots are not touched by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,

A light from the shadows shall spring;

Renewed shall be blade that is broken:

The crownless again shall be king.